A New Year

The title is cliche, and the contents may be as well, but I feel inspired to share a few of my reflections about this new year and the things I have learned spiritually in the past year. I hope some of these can be a blessing or encouragement to everyone who reads them.

I don't really know where to begin, and I have already shared much of my spiritual journey in this venue throughout the past year. I feel like I have grown more in this year alone than I ever have in my life of serving God. I'd like to relate a few points about my experience this year and what lessons I have learned. In doing so, I will become vulnerable. Yet, I feel like the struggles I faced are not uncommon, and I am convinced the things I learned are valuable for every Christian.

In January of 2017, my grandpa became sick. Just like now, I had just returned from a trip Guthrie, Oklahoma for the winter meeting. At first, we didn't know what was wrong with him. Through time, his heart condition worsened, and ultimately, he passed away on April 9th. The death of a loved one is certainly difficult. Caring for someone you love when they continue to deteriorate is hard to do. Yet, the spiritual lessons from such an event are incredible. God is faithful to put people in your life who love and care for you, who are concerned about you, and who embody the qualities of Christ's compassion for us. God was faithful to give me people like that in my life and He kept me comforted despite the circumstances around me. God is always with us. No matter the situation, He's right beside us. He's the God of the hills and valleys, the ups and downs, and the darkest places we could imagine. And in those places where we are surrounded by darkness, He sees things we don't. For me, He saw how I could learn from the death of my grandpa that God is omnipresent. Always with us, and always loving. Yet, it took me a little while to realize those things and fully understand them.

In May of 2017, I lost a cousin in a tragic way. It was a very sad time, and it was very hard to cope with such a loss only one month after my grandpa's funeral. In my life, I was at a crucial point. I could either continue in my life distant from God, or renew my experience with Him and learn from the lessons He was trying to teach me. At the Guthrie meeting in May, Bro. Michael Smith preached a message titled "Back to Bethel." It was one of those greatly inspired, heavily convicting messages that God sends at times in our lives where we have important decisions to make. In the first five minutes, I was under conviction, and couldn't wait for him to sit down so I could get things right with God. I met with God after the message and prayed for renewal. It was something long needed and exceptionally important. I had struggled with truly believing God loved and cared for me enough to save me and keep me around. My experience was lackluster and without true life-giving vigor. But in the deaths of my family, I recognized the support of the saints, the provision of good friends God has for us, and the care and compassion they have for us. God was faithful to not only reveal Himself to me, but reveal Himself through others. I learned how much love God can have for us, and how important it is for us to accept that love, not just realize it's there. There is a fountain filled with blood, we have to draw from that fountain in our lives.

I don't feel like I have adequately explained all that God taught me in those things, but I've shared a lot of that before in various ways, so hopefully it's a blessing. But God has witnessed in a way this year that I don't want to forget, and I'd like to catalog it here so it may serve as a reminder for me, and possibly as a blessing for others. That revelation of God's love has driven me to serve Christ as best as I know how.

God also gave me a scripture recently that really struck me. 1 Timothy 1:5 reads:
"Now the end of the commandment is charity out of a pure heart, and of a good conscience, and of faith unfeigned."
This verse really stood out to me. The end of the commandment, or the conclusion or summation of God's commandment, is charity, or love. Above all things, God's mission for us is love. That shouldn't be surprising, as it is the foundation of His salvation for us. It was out of love that Christ came to the world in flesh and die, in flesh, bearing the weight of every sin. It was love that drove Him to be merciful to sinners, to bear their sin on His back and die to make them without blemish. Yet, Christ has conditions for our love to meet. The standard is high. Charity is to be out of a pure heart and of a good conscience. Salvation qualifies a believer of a pure heart, and our conscience is good when we are without sin. Thank the Lord we can live above the traps of sin and rejoice in the glorious love Christ has available for us. It is also of faith unfeigned, or as Adam Clarke defines, "a faith not hypocritical." A faith not shaken or moved, where the actions of the person reflect a trust in God and not dependency on the flesh. A good conscience and a pure heart are produced because of the faith of sins pardoned and new life given. It's a rich blessing to live in the love of God.

Not only is this love for us, but it is to be shared by us. Sis. LaDawna Adams gave a message at Guthrie this winter meeting that focused on love, and it challenged us to forward that love on to others around us, not just those in the camp of the saints, but to sinners as well. Christ died to redeem, and unless we show that love to them, they might not ever fully realize the magnitude of what Jesus did for them. In my devotions yesterday, I read how we too often stay content in the misty valleys below because of the ruggedness and challenge we think climbing the hills or mountains causes. But, in doing so, we are being content with less of what God has for us. More love is available the higher we climb. Don't be afraid to climb, God will not put on us more than we can bear.

I returned from Youth Mission Camp at the Pearl of Grace Ranch yesterday evening, and the theme of the camp was new beginnings. God was merciful and gave me a new beginning last year to my spiritual life, and gave me a chance of revival. The new year brings with it a sense of new beginning, and I want this beginning to be devoted to Christ. I have learned much in the past year, and I intend to keep learning, keep growing, and keep moving forward. It's not an easy trek, and the devil is just as faithful to lay traps in my way. But, with our trust in God and Him as our guide, I'm confident I have nothing to fear. I can't explain how much I have been blessed by God in this past year, and I want this new year to be a reflection in my life of all that I have learned. Pray for me.

Keep encouraged!